IVF update

Happy Wednesday! I have been meaning to give everyone an IVF update for a while now and I am just getting around to it. Things have been crazy busy around here lately! I have been kind of trying to lay low and put my body first and rest. I have gotten SO many questions that I thought it would be easier to do a Q&A type format. So here it goes!

Why did you decide to do IVF?

After six months of Clomid and two failed IUI cycles my husband and I met with our doctor to reevaluate and figure out what we needed to do next. My doctor discovered that I don’t ovulate on my right side at all. I do ovulate on my left side but the problem is that my left tube isn’t functioning. So, in order for me to get pregnant the right tube would need to reach over to my left side and grab that egg. My doctor thinks the tube has issues due to having c-sections.

Have you been emotional since first starting?

YES! I have cried over everything! It has been so crazy emotional and I am sure the hormones don’t help at all. My poor husband and sisters don’t quite know what to do with me! I have also been SO tired. You may have noticed that I have been a little quieter on social media lately and it’s just because I am so exhausted all the time.

Have you been able to work out since starting IVF? 

No. My doctor told me to rest as much as possible. I have been very strict with myself and really try to be careful even picking up Cannon.

How bad were the shots? 

I am TERRIFIED of needles. This is the part I was most anxious and nervous about! I feel so lucky and blessed that I have an amazing support system. I knew there was no way that I could give the shots to myself so my awesome sister-in-law who is a nurse and lives up the street offered to do my shots for me,  she literally came to my house everyday, twice a day for two weeks and gave me my shots. She was such a lifesaver for me!

Did they hurt? 

Getting shots is never fun but they weren’t as bad as I was expecting. It wasn’t the needle that hurt as bad as the medicine that burns when it went in.

How did you feel after your egg retrieval?

I was pretty loopy for a few hours after. When I woke up I just remember feeling really crampy. Within the next day or two I started to feel better.

How may eggs were retrieved?

22 eggs. 19 were mature and 16 fertilized. By day three we had 14 and by day five we had 12.

Are you doing a fresh or frozen transfer?

Frozen. My doctor actually has better success rates with frozen transfers because it can give your body time to heal from the egg retrieval. We will be doing the transfer hopefully within the next month.

How many embryos are you putting in?

This is still up in the air. We might put two in but will probably do one.

Which Vitamins are you taking?

I take a prenatal every night and I also take coQ10.

Have you gained weight?

Ugh. Yes, unfortunately this is a major side effect. I have gained 7 pounds! I am hoping it’s just water weight and bloating and will go away quick!

Any other side effects?

Major headaches and exhaustion. It’s crazy what you will do and go through to get a baby here!

What have been some of the best resources for you in learning about IVF?

Honestly, some of the best resources for me have been friends. It’s so nice to feel like you aren’t alone in all of this. I have a few amazing friends that have either gone through IVF or are going through it and its been so great to be able to talk to them about it. While you may want to talk to sisters or close friends, they just don’t understand what it’s like and all the emotions you are feeling so I would say to really find people that have gone through it and talk to them! Here are a couple of blogs I have loved to follow and they are also my friends that I have been so lucky to have through this process! You can find them here, here and here.

If you are looking at doing IVF and need help financially I have heard that Footsteps to Fertility in an amazing resource. Thank you all for your kind words and support. It really means so much and I can’t wait to continue on this journey and share with it you!

37 Comments

  1. I am so glad you shared this, I myself am going through fertility issues as well. I just completed my first IUI, I find out if I am pregnant on Friday. It is so hard to talk about, I felt like once I talked about what was going on it would make it feel real which terrified me. I do realize now that I am certainly not alone! Over the past two years I have had more friends who needed to take these steps than those who got pregnant naturally. I am crossing my fingers for you and hoping you get that precious baby you want! I will be sure coming back here to see how everything worked out for you, especially if my husband and I need to take this step!

    1. Ashley, I did my first IUI last Tuesday and have my blood test a week from today but I’ll probably do a HPT on Tuesday which will be 14 days post IUI. Keep us posted!
      Emily, thanks for the info and bringing women together. We need support systems even if it’s on the internet! Good luck Em!

  2. Hi! Thanks for sharing your journey. I will be starting IVF in May and am really nervous. I’m more afraid of the progesterone shots! If you have any tips on these shots please share.

    1. Ask your doctor for a prescription for numbing cream – you don’t even feel the needle! You still feel it in your muscle but it’s not as scary!

      1. Liz- I am currently expecting my first baby through IVF. As crazy as it sounds the shots will get easier! With IVF comes a lot of needles. I had progesterone shots every day for 2 1/2 months and I have never liked needles! I would ice the injection site before my husband gave me my shot which I felt helped. I will say the area was a little tender for a good month after I stopped my progesterone shots, but it goes away and is well worth it! Good luck! Know that your not alone with all of your thoughts and feelings! It’s a crazy adventure!

    1. Hi Kirsten,
      While I’m sure you didn’t mean it to be, suggesting adopting “if you really want” another kid can be a very insensitive comment to women experiencing infertility. In fact, any advice or suggestions about how to go about having a child can make a woman feel even more inept about something that is very, very hard for us. Infertility is an incredibly isolating condition and comments like this make our struggles feel like they are easy to fix. Trust me, we think of every option when we are faced with the crushing process of years of failure when trying to have a child.

      Karen

  3. Hi Emily,

    Great post! I’m have no personal experience with IVF but as a nursing student I follow Natalie Crawford MD…she has posts so many great tips and resources. You might like her. Wishing you the best & can’t wait to see this new miracle!!

  4. I have been waiting for an update from you! I’ve been thinking of you and hoping things are going well. I did IVF for my 2nd baby and it was such an emotional experience. Even with lots of support, no one really gets it unless they’ve experienced it. IVF was successful for us and I just know you’ll get your baby too! Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

  5. I truly appreciate your honesty with this. I think anything involving kids and fertility brings with it judgment and sometimes negative comments, but hearing experiences like this is so important. Thank you for sharing with us.

  6. First of all, I wish you the best and much success in your journey. What would you do with all other eggs? I am confuse, are the 12 other eggs fertilezed as well? You will use only two???? what happens to all the other potential babies? Adoption would have been such a blessing to a little one. Did you ever think about that? I wish you well, you have a lovely family, it’s hard to understand all you are going through, specially since you already have a beautiful family.

    1. I know it is 100% not my place to respond to this comment-only Emily should do that, but I’m going to go ahead and do it. As a woman who is literally experiencing IUI and IVF on the same schedule as Emily, I have to stand up here (for her and all other women suffering with infertility) and say – Please please please be careful with your words. I’m sure you don’t mean any harm, but questioning why a woman going through this won’t consider adoption is cruel and thoughtless. If you get to the point that you’re investing $20k + per round in order to administer shots 2x a day, feel terrible, go to the doctor numerous times a week to be poked and prodded, then go through 2 invasive procedures, it is very clear that you are hopeful that you want to try to have your own biological child. Its not to say that adoption doesn’t cross our minds-because it certainly does. But the simple truth is every woman going to a fertility specialist for IUI or IVF or anything else hopes to be mothers to her own biological children. Also, just because she has a family already does not diminish the fact that they still want it to grow. No circumstance is ever a reason that a woman should not try the IVF route if she wants a child and cannot conceive. And lastly, questioning what she will do with the other embryos, etc. -I’m really sorry but that is a VERY personal decision that she has no obligation to share. Everyone in our shoes has to battle the moral choice of what is best to do with those. Yes, she put this topic on a public forum, but her intentions were to help other women struggling with infertility-not to share every intimate detail of the very painful process. Infertility is a very taboo topic, unfortunately. If the truth were known, there are probably a lot more people you know struggling with it than you realize. It is gut wrenching, emotionally devastating, physically painful and exhaustive and mentally debilitating. Unless you’ve experienced it, you cannot understand the pain that comes with this struggle, so please try to be graceful with women who are dealing with this. I’m sure it is curiosity on your part more than anything else, but it definitely does not come off that way. The only analogy I can give you is that you wouldn’t question a Cancer patient for their treatment choices-please give women with infertility the same respect. Ok, soapbox over.

        1. My husband and I are expecting our first baby via IVF and I could not agree more with Rachel’s response!
          It’s hard to for people to understand everything thing you and your partner go through. I think it’s awesome Emily has chosen to share her very personal experience!

  7. I have several friends who dealt with infertility and it’s so comforting to hear from other people who are dealing with the same struggles, even if they are internet strangers! Thank you for sharing your experiences.

  8. Thanks so much for sharing. I’m sure that your journey is helping many other women out there. Remember to just rest as much as you can, eat well and spend time with your wonderful family! You will get through this!

  9. Emily – this may be a bit TMI, but were your first two pregnancies naturally conceived? I underwent a c-section with my first naturally conceived pregnancy and we are thinking of trying again for our second but I wonder if we’ll have similar complications due to my c-section? Is that common?

  10. Thank you for sharing your your story 🙂 How long after the egg retrieval do you have to wait until you can do the transfer? Thanks 🙂

  11. I’m sorry you have to go through this, Emily. Even though I’m nowhere close to being a mom, you have my support. I appreciated you sharing your story and I love getting to know you more when you share personal stories even if it’s struggles. xo

  12. What clinic are you going to? I went to Utah Fertility Center and I absolutely loved them. Just curious.

  13. I have had a family member go through IVF after several miscarriages and understand how hard and emotional it is. She is now pregnant and due in July. I applaud you for talking about it – I think you can help other people become comfortable with their fertility issues and hopefully reach out themselves. Best of luck. God bless.

  14. Emily this is a secret journey that many people go through. Thank you for posting and being so vulnerable. You have a platform to help people not feel alone in their fertility story. This topic is not discussed enough! Ignore the insensitive comments…”did you think about this” or “did you think about that” or “you already have this and that.” Can’t wait to here how your IVF goes. Praying for a healthy pregnancy (with how to style the bump posts!) and more importantly a healthy happy baby to complete your beautiful family.

  15. I wish you all the best of luck for your FET. I think it is perfectly fine wanting to have children and not wanting to adopt. It is something which is not for everyone and there are parents out there who can’t have “their own” children (as in from their own egg and sperm) and who will adopt instead.

    Plus Emily never said what they will do with the other frozen embryos. The night want to have even more children and can use the frozen ones then, or at some point when family planning is finished, they might decide to give their frozen embryos up for adoption, giving other couples the opportunity to become parents.

    This is such a sensitiv topic, please don’t go off on each other because of assumptions.

    Best
    Sarah

  16. Bless your heart for being so open and honest about this process. It’s so refreshing. I know it’s tough. And your blog is so aspirational, so it’s nice to see you open up and share things that aren’t so picture perfect. Best of luck and babydust!!

  17. I hope your dream will come true and you will become a mom for another kid. Think positively because it really works. I am with you wholeheartedly. Ela.

  18. thank you for sharing this. we tried for 6 months, conceived, miscarried.. and now I’m looking to the future and wondering what the road ahead will be like and if it will include IVF so this is really helpful. Wishing you success on conceiving another healthy baby soon!

  19. If you don’t know Ellie and Jared Mecham, they’re in Logan Utah, and they’re really popular on youtube (1m followers) and they’ve done a lot with IVF and helped fun 7 IVF grants through footsteps of fertility, you should reach out to them!

  20. My vote would be 2 embryo transfers! That is if I have a say in the matter 😉. I have twins from a natural pregnancy and there is seriously nothing better than experiencing a twin bond. It’s amazing, double the help and double the fun!

  21. Good luck Emily. You will be in my prayers. My sister has gone through the IVF process and I know how intense the whole experience could be but the end result ( a baby!) is so worth it. Take care and lots of love! – Jyoti

  22. I really admire you for being so open about your infertility, especially in such a public way. I cannot imagine how emotionally and physically painful this process has been for you and your husband. Wishing you great success with your treatment!

  23. What a raw, honest and truly inspirational post. So many people struggle through fertility/infertility issues without talking about it. I recently experienced a miscarriage and am exploring all my options. I have so much respect for women who share their stories because it helps so many others. I am curious to know what brand of CoQ1o you are using? I have read so many positive things about it. I am so excited for you and will be following your journey! Lots of love!